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dotcom moments
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Wrap
Text File
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2001-03-31
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3KB
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92 lines
=====================================================================
The dialogue is as far as I can remember a verbatim account of
a portion of yesterday's company meeting. The rest of the fluff
is just me blowing off steam ;)
==============================
The setting:
------------
A January 'turning-in-new-directions' meeting at a dotcom
startup. Like most dotcom startups, this one has been burning
cash for over six months and has yet to produce any revenue.
"Everyone" is perfectly happy about this because they are
confident that the next Shiny Idea will be The Big One. The
next deal struck will be the Big Buck. There are no complete
products yet, and the company can't stick to one idea for more
than a month. But the most important thing about a dotcom is
its website, right?
The cast:
---------
Money The chairman and financial backer of said dotcom, a geek who's
old enough to have used keypunch cards for program input. He
actually had a successful idea once, which is why he can afford
to back this far-seeing and forward-thinking enterprise.
MD The Managing Director (when he's talking to a Brit) or CEO
(when he's talking to an American). His background is software
sales. And before that, Her Majesty's Royal Navy.
NOC Network Administrator, Chief Consultant, and expert layer of
Ethernet cabling. A chemist turned geek.
Webmaster Perl Programmer, Project Manager, and Chief Cook and
Bottle Washer, a geek.
Trainer Course-writer, imparter of Clue to the clueless, a geek.
PFY Website content-writer, PR person, Avoider of Tea-making, and
of course, PFY.
The story so far:
-----------------
Webmaster is attempting to get the information she needs (to
build Version 2 of the company's website) out of the MD.
-------------
Act the first
-------------
MD: So PFY will gather everyone's ideas for version two of the website!
Webmaster: Um... The structure of the website needs to be based
on the business goals of the company, rather than on a list
of "good ideas".
MD: The business goals are my concern, and I will let
you know where they impact the website. The design of
the site is completely up to you!!
Webmaster: Yes, but I can't even start thinking about designing a
structure until I understand what the objective of the
website is.
MD: The objective of the website is to drive traffic!!!
Webmaster: To drive traffic where?
MD: To the website. The objective is to generate traffic
for the website.
Trainer: Porn.
Webmaster: [nods] Porn.
MD: To generate traffic from our target audience, I mean.
Trainer: Our audience is IT professionals, who are mostly men,
with incomes. Still porn.
Webmaster: [nods] Porn.
[MD turns a lovely shade of purple]
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curtain
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